Pregnancy: Week 4
I wrote this post back in July, when I was almost five weeks’s pregnant, and just starting to accept that this little baby might be here to stay! Now that I’ve made the official announcement, I’m finally publishing it!
A few days passed after I noticed the implantation bleeding, I managed to convince myself that I had imagined it. I was working my way through the days for Level 2 of the 30 Day Shred and I felt like I was flying it. In fact I got so confident that I decided to give Level 3 a shot a couple of days earlier than scheduled.
Big mistake. Within a few minutes of starting the routine, I felt like I pulled something in my side. I couldn’t do most of the exercises. The following day, my side was still sore so I had to take a day off. I decided to go back to Level 1 when I returned to exercise the day after. Even so, I felt off. My energy felt sapped.
The little voice in the back of my head was screaming “That’s because you’re pregnant, YOU’RE PREGNANT!” But denial is a funny thing.
The weekend rolled around, and I was due to go visit a friend of mine for the weekend. We had a big night of cocktails and dancing planned. That morning, I realised I had to face up to the fact that my period was two days late and do a test, before I went drinking that night.
You can guess what happened. Two minutes later, I was staring at a positive test. Over the course of that day, two more positive tests confirmed the same thing. Definitely pregnant.
To say my head was spinning is something of an understatement. I was freaked out. We wanted a new baby. We definitely wanted to get pregnant. But I was scared out of my mind. I’m a researcher at heart and I’d read enough about miscarriage risk to know that having two previously meant my chances of having another miscarriage were higher.
I’d only just mentally recovered from the last one. I felt like I was starting to get back on track. Thinking about the possibility of losing another baby almost brought me out in a cold sweat. When I should have been celebrating, instead I was trying to stay calm. “Relax” I told myself. “Relax” Charlie told me. Just relax. Easier said than done.
Find my complete Pregnancy Journal here.
Those first 3 months are already nerve wracking without the added worry of previous miscarriages, it must have been so much more difficult for you to try to relax through it 🙁
Much easier said than done. I can imagine your head was racing trying to process it all.
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